I wanted to address the rumors of surrogacy that may be traceable to Ms. Markle. If the rumor of surrogacy is indeed from Ms. Markle and/or her acquittances, she’s been extremely cruel.
#1. A woman’s value is not derived from her womb: Harry’s sister-in-law is her own person. She is loved and is valued like anyone else by her family and friends; however, such rumors imply that her values as a wife lie solely in her ability to carry a child. Regardless of historical/anachronistic perception of the British monarchy, it’s degrading to negate all the other good qualities she may have and start a rumor that focuses on ONE of her ORGANS. If the rumor is indeed true, it is exceptionally cruel, because even a normal woman forced to use surrogacy are at risk of developing psychological and emotional issues. Releasing such information on a public platform will indeed cause damage to her self-esteem and self-value.
#2. Infertility is more complicated than you think. Obviously, there are both female and MALE causes of infertility, but there are also compatibility issues too (a woman’s cervical mucus may be hostile—yes, that’s the term used—to her partner’s sperm). Whatever the case, infertility is one of the most heartbreaking cases you can observe. It can make or break a couple. Even with IVF (which itself is a exhausting and a demanding process), many couples find it very unfair that they have to resort to such process when there are some getting “knocked up” so easily. So having such rumors being discussed publicly may cause strains on an already-strained relationship.
#3. Suggestions that Harry’s nephews and niece must be somehow less legitimate based on their conception are very mean-spirited. If a person told parents of an adopted child that they’re not his/her “real parents,” the society would lambaste that person in a heartbeat. Everyone knows that giving birth doesn’t automatically make you a parent. Parenting is a PROCESS of raising those brats—I mean, children. So why is it OK to delegitimize children born from IVF when they’re biological children of their parents?
#4. It’s disrespectful to the person who trusted Ms. Markle with such information. Ms. Markle has/had ONE connection to the British Royal Family, and that’s Harry. If the recent rumor is from her, it would mean that she not only betrayed Harry’s trust for popularity and her friends, but she placed him in a precarious position within his own family.
Honestly, I don’t think it’s any of our business if Harry’s nephews and nieces were born of surrogacy or of IVF. I may not have analyzed every picture from every angle, simply because I don’t care, but from what I’ve seen from the headline news, the new mother seemed swollen. There’s a difference between swelling and fat, something some women who “fake” pregnancy seem to not understand. What I find bothersome is that these so-called critics are using a procedure chosen by many infertile couples as a way to publicly attack a woman and her children. Even if her critics will say that they’re a “fair game” because they’re on a public platform, what about all those other everyday IVF couple and children coming across these salacious gossips? Such cruel words toward public figures who could be going through what they’re going through give an impression that THEY’re somehow “less than” others. As IF they have something to be ashamed of. THAT’s why some women are forced to wear prosthetic bellies and fake their pregnancy. So if Ms. Markle and her so-called friends (I don’t think people leading you away from God and toward a worldly path are real friends) were the ones who “leaked” such malicious gossip, shame on them. They’re not just attacking ONE innocent woman and her children; they’re attacking many others undergoing heartbreaking process out of sheer jealousy.
Thank you, RCC~ the lengths some people go to humiliate. I agree with you, it’s heartbreaking process, I wasn’t able to have children of my own I know this first hand. I was even told I wasn’t trying hard enough, it’s unbearable to go to a baby shower you think you’re a failure. IVF can be hit or miss, expensive and emotional.
Thank you again for writing this piece. JD